Thursday, April 03, 2008

bathroom attendants are bound to give me a UTI (dated 10.1.07)

i'll get straight to the point. i hate bathroom attendants. they suck. i didn't ask for you to squirt soap in my hands and then hand me a paper towel. thanks, but i'm fully capable of doing those things myself. and what's with the sign? "please tip me, i'm lame and can't get a real job, but i'm sitting here on my cell phone that i can clearly afford. i suck at life." ok, so it's harsh, but i'm broke too. i'm pretty sure bars don't hire these people, so what the hell man???

another good title to this blog could've been "bathroom attendants cause 68% of spreading bacteria in America." you wouldn't believe how many people i see leave the bathroom without washing their hands to avoid the dreaded attendant. it's gross, but geez, i understand. well fuck you lady, i'm washing my hands. i don't have health insurance and can't afford to get sick with germs i pick up from the freaking nasty bathroom. i'm fighting the power.

so why are they going to cause me to get a UTI (urinary tract infection for those of you not hip to the acronym lingo)? because i'm sick of seeing them, especially after a few drinks. it makes me want to snap. so my solution? i'm not peeing. hence the UTI. and when it happens, i'm taking the money that some suckers gave you in that stupid tray to pay for my hospital bill.

UPDATE: I HAD A FRIEND PASS OUT DRUNK IN A BATHROOM LAST WEEKEND WHERE THERE WAS A BATHROOM ATTENDANT. ANOTHER REASON WHY THEY SUCK.

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